The answer might be in your closet.

Having a tough time deciding what to wear for your boudoir session? You’re not alone- it’s the number two thing women worry about when they plan their shoot (number one: Will my stomach/cellulite/arms/etc look awful and are you judging me?). When people ask me “What should I wear for my boudoir session,” they are usually asking what lingerie they should buy.

Now, I can answer that (you can check out my creatively titled “What lingerie should I buy for my boudoir photoshoot?“) but as much fun as it is to shop for the perfect outfit to wear for your boudoir session, sexy photography is not just about cute negligées. What you wear for your boudoir session should be a reflection of your personality and what feels sexy to you- whether it’s spiked leather cuffs, Parisian lingerie or your boyfriend or girlfriend’s button-up.

Great stuff to wear for your boudoir session that you might already have

~An oversized dress shirt or flannel~
For the effortlessly sexy “just grabbed their shirt” look from many a rom-com:

What-to-wear-for-your-boudoir-session_mens-dress-shirt

 

~A cute t-shirt and panties~
The barefoot girl-next-door look never goes out of style. Or, showcase your inner geek!

What-should-wear-for-my-boudoir-session_cute-t-shirt

~A filmy scarf or pretty length of fabric~
Fun for twirling around you, draping over your shoulder, or even turning into a skirt for a classy couture look.

What-to-wear-for-your-boudoir-session_sheer-fabric

~That dress you never get to wear~
Fell in love with a gorgeous gown or sweet summer dress that you never seem to find a place to wear? Photoshoots are a great time to play dressup! And there is an awful lot of seductive power in slowly taking off a beautiful dress.

What-to-wear-for-my-boudoir-session-dress

~Your favourite oversized sweater~
Or any sweater that opens in the front or has a nice loose neckline that can fall seductively over your shoulder. The casual, relaxed sexiness looks great and can also be a nice gentle start to a photography session, a bit less intimidating than putting on your most daring skimpies first thing..

What-to-wear-for-my-boudoir-session_sweater

~Nothing at all~
My personal favourite. While you don’t have to take it all off for your boudoir session, there is something incredibly empowering about getting naked in front of the camera. Plus, with the money you’ll save buying fewer outfits you’ll be able to afford to splurge on the ones you do buy- check out fab local lingerie boutique Bayberry Intimates, Edmonton lingerie store Princess Lingerie, or look online at my favourite plus sized fashion retailer Torrid or the luxuriously sexy Agent Provocateur for ideas! And if you haven’t seen it yet, my guide to the best lingerie to buy for your boudoir photoshoot is here.

Want more tips on how to get ready for your boudoir photoshoot? Sign up for my super-cool spam-free newsletter and I’ll send you more, plus (once we can breathe each others’ air again) invitations to all the best parties, makeup classes, movie nights and other fun stuff!

 

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The best answer to “What lingerie should I buy for my boudoir photoshoot” is: the lingerie you feel good in. Above all else, you should feel fabulous in what you’re wearing. If you don’t feel like a sexy diva ready to leave a trail of broken hearts, take that s%$& off!

For most of my life I did not own lingerie, for boudoir photoshoots or anything else. Then my boyfriend bought me a lovely rose-coloured lace negligée that almost got him dumped in front of all of our friends. Once I got over my indignation, I was hooked!

It helps that I am always buying the next bit of lingerie for my boudoir photoshoot, because I always have my next one planned (professional development, guys)- so even if the kids keep us up all night and the closest to “special time” I spend with the man of my dreams is staring, zombie-like, at the TV, I know I have an excuse to buy Those Fabulous Panties and That Dreamy Robe. Boudoir photography is the ultimate free pass for shopping!

(Because we get this question so often, we’ve partnered with fabulous Edmonton and Ponoka (for the Red Deer studio) lingerie boutiques to arrange personal shopping experiences for our clients- let us know if you want to take advantage of this free bonus service!)

The best lingerie for your boudoir photoshoot

~Bra and Panties~

Bring a few sets, and make sure they fit! Great places to update your bra fitting and find beautiful new bras and panties include the Edmonton lingerie boutique Bayberrie IntimatesEdmonton bra shop Princess Lingerie and Ponoka bra shop Busted Lingerie, which is totally worth the trip plus you can stop by my acreage and pat the horses. Rolling you around on the bed in your underwear is a classic part of your boudoir photoshoot, so you’ll want at least one set that look good on their own as well as anything you need to go under other outfits. Note: Your bra and panties don’t need to match, just go well together.

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For panties, lace boyshorts and retro high-waisted briefs are my absolute favourite, but there are lots of cute styles out there. Just make sure to find underwear with a waistband that doesn’t cut in, and be aware that if you choose a g-string or thong, the back will… well… disappear. Consider yourself warned.

~Stockings and garter belts~
There’s not much sexier than a good pair of thigh-highs, but unfortunately most thigh-high stockings are pinchy stay-ups that dig in and both look and feel terrible. But wait, there’s a solution! Old-fashioned stockings that need a garter belt are wicked sexy and photograph beautifully. Check out alternate fashion retailer Nightshade Corsets in Edmonton for a full range of size options- there’s a location across the street from the studio.

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~Negligées and babydolls~
A boudoir staple, they are fun and easy to find. Just make sure they drape well, fit nicely around your breasts and give the girls your preferred level of support. Some babydolls have a poofiness that can make your middle look big, so be very choosy.

What-to-wear-for-boudoir-photoshoot_babydoll

~Corsets~

Always in fashion but so hard to find an excuse to wear, corsets are a great addition to your boudoir bag. Just don’t expect to do a lot of bending! Overbust corsets can do great things for your boobs, whereas underbust corsets allow more movement and variety in posing. I have a bit of a corset problem, so the studio wardrobe has corsets to fit everyone if you don’t have your own and like the look.

~Bodysuits~
Sleek and fun, bodysuits stay where they’re put and are hella sexy. I know the idea of form-fitting lingerie can be intimidating, but trust me that they look fab. And if your stomach isn’t your favourite thing to highlight, bodysuits can help boost your confidence (though seriously, don’t worry about it- #1, you’re beautiful, and #2, good light is 1000 times more important).

What-to-wear-for-boudoir-photoshoot_bodysuit

~Heels~

The higher, the better! I can’t personally walk the things, but luckily when you’re deciding what to wear for your boudoir photoshoot you don’t have to worry about walking. They’re just there to make your bum look fantastic! Don’t worry about shoes to match every outfit, though, since we do most things barefoot.

~Retro Lingerie~
High-waisted panties and longline bras have made a dramatic comeback and boudoir photographers everywhere are thrilled. Sexy and chic, these styles flatter curves and give a lovely vintage look to photographs.

Boudoir-photoshoot_retro-high-waisted-panties

Want to know a secret, though? Buying lingerie for your boudoir photoshoot is totally optional. You can create a fabulous set of boudoir outfits from things you already have in your closet (check out this article of more casual ideas for what to wear for your boudoir session) or wear- you guessed it- nothing at all. If buying lingerie feels like a fun way of getting ready for your boudoir shoot, get out there and get shopping! But if that’s not your jam, that’s just fine. Your boudoir shoot is about making you feel sexy in a way that works for you, not about trying to fit you in a box. So think about what makes YOU feel sexy, and have fun getting ready!

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I’ve been meaning to tell you guys this story for a while, so, apropos of nothing…

Scene: I’m at my favourite Indian restaurant with about 20 of my closest friends. It’s my 29th birthday (the first one). The New Boyfriend, looking pleased with himself, hands me a gift bag. Everyone pauses to look. I reach in to feel soft lace, and pull out… pink. Pink lingerie.

Do I LOOK like a pink lingerie girl?

Fine, it was actually a beautiful kind of antique rose, but from the shit-eating grin on his face I knew he’d gotten pink just to rile me. Delicate, girly… everything I’m not.

Or don’t want to admit I am.

So I shot him a look that was somewhere halfway between pleased and annoyed, and then checked the tag. Small. With an inner sigh, I raised an eyebrow at him. “It’s been six months. You should know by now that you don’t have to buy me clothing that doesn’t fit out of some misguided attempt to protect my self-esteem.” In the ridiculous world of women’s lingerie I am generally a large or extra large, you see.

Now, up until then, he was okay. But then he opened his mouth. Amazing how those size 14 feet can fit right in there.

“It’s okay,” he said, explaining himself. “I checked with the saleswoman. She says it’s based on bust size!”

Amazingly, ten years later I’m still with him.Pink Lace Boudoir Photo

And it fits perfectly.

 

 

*Photo by Jess Lark

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  • Ben

    The fact that you have neither left me, nor murdered me, continues to be as much a surprise to me as it is to you!ReplyCancel

It’s looking kind of apocalyptic out there, and all of us are struggling. Self-care, always a necessity, is no longer something we can put on the back burner. We can’t expect our mental health to take care of itself, and we can’t afford to neglect ourselves anymore.

I can’t use boudoir magic to make people feel better right now, but I’m going to be here helping nonetheless. So this is the beginning of a series of self-care challenges, ideas, and inspirations. I want you to come out of this healthy and strong, so make yourself a priority! It’s times like this that we need to pull together, support each other, and find new ways of strengthening our resilience.

Today’s challenge:

Throwback Thursday

Use that old-fashioned device, the tel-e-phone, and call someone you don’t usually. A childhood friend, someone you used to talk to but have fallen out of touch with for no good reason… grab a cup of cocoa or glass of wine and take the time to reconnect.

If you’ve got phone anxiety, here’s a trick to beat it; at the moment you think of who to call, count, 5-4-3-2-1 and then do it. No thinking. It’ll be fine once you’re in, I promise!

(If you do this challenge, comment below and tell me how it went!)

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Sometimes I like to use my blog to shamelessly brag about how great my friends are, and this is one of those times. <3

I met Debbie in 2013 when she impulsively decided to come on the very first Fearless Destination Boudoir Retreat. These days, the retreats are well-known all over the world and when women sign up they can look back at old blog posts and galleries and Instagram pics and have a pretty good idea of what to expect; but this was the very first one. It had never been done before- not just by me, but by anyone. No one in the world was doing anything like this. So she was basically signing up to go across the ocean with a stranger with a cool dream and only charisma to back it up.

Debbie, along with Colette, Lilliana and Doreen, the original Fearless women, is the reason that the retreats exist today; their trust and bravery in taking a chance on my crazy idea has sparked not just the last 7 years of amazing adventures but a revolution in the boudoir world. Retreats like ours are starting to happen all over, little pockets of fabulousness, girlpower and body positivity that are lights in the darkness.

So, what kind of person takes that kind of crazy gamble? I’ll tell you.

Debbie is brave and loud and unabashedly herself. She’s a musician in the army and she takes no shit from anyone. She’s the most loyal friend you could ask for, and will be your friend in a minute if you let her. She’s generous and silly and warm and has a big personality and she always says “yes” to adventure- like the time she came on the Bali retreat and impulsively went to Australia afterwards for a quick visit to a friend while she was in the area. She has been on every international retreat and I can’t imagine them without her- her friendship, laughter and support are a part of so many of my best memories.

Today is her birthday, and while I can’t go visit her, I can (and did!) dredge my hard drives for photos from every retreat to share with you. <3 I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

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